Handbags and Gladrags

This stage in the pregnancy is a difficult time. Too early to have anything to show but too far gone to reverse the
full throes of 'morning' sickness and fatigue. Speaking of which, that girl sure can sleep!Over this Bank Holiday weekend, it seems she slept as many hours in the day as night. Certainly an unusual development for Cat since she is always the first out of bed and never usually tires. There is also another new development, something I call - Bad Things Paranoia. There is a scene in the Ricky Gervais Office Xmas special where the pregnant office colleague makes a big scene out of two working staff who are smoking next to her. They tell her
in no uncertain terms to get off and that they couldn't give two hoots about her pregnancy.It is true, that for most first time Mums-to-be, the new found status means that anything and everything must now involve her, and her unborn baby.For Cat, she is most anxious about the evils of cigarette smoke. We went out the other night to a restaurant and all
she could think about was whether anyone would be smoking. Later this week, she is due to meet up with her girly friends, again, she is very worried about lengthy periods sat in a smoky room.On the bus the other day, two rather rough looking badass men started lighting up next to her and she shouted at them that she was PREGNANT and NO could they PLEASE STOP SMOKING. They ignored her while I shamefully cowered in the seat.

Spreading the word

We've slowly begun dropping the news to various close friends. It is always interesting to note their reactions. After all, why on Earth should anyone really care whether or not you are pregnant? But it seems the delight from our friends is genuinely heartfelt and the good wishes create a nice feeling. One friend from Germany seemed to jump with joy at the thought of a future British playmate for his own, not yet born child. Another friend, who also is expecting very soon, looked forward to social outings where these same-age kids could play together. One of Cat's friends couldn't stop texting her with her good wishes and we think it has boosted her own, well publicised, notions of broodiness (much to the chagrin of her boyfriend). Next week we'll be visiting my best man who doubtlessly will be full of advice and homespun wisdom as he had his first child only a year ago.
It seems, the world right now is filled entirely with parents and parents-to-be.
Today I wandered around an open air market and couldn't help but browse at the pushchair and buggy stall. I was half thinking - this is not right for me to be here - and half realising that, at 35, I am probably twice the age of some of the punters who are here!

Booby

One of the symptoms of pregnancy during the first trimester I have read, is the huge swelling of women’s breasts. Poor Cat, not the most light chested of women normally, has witnessed an almost overnight doubling in size of her breasts. I am truly transfixed by them. Whilst I might derive pleasure at the sight of these giant mammaries, Cat has to suffer the increased weight, pain and obstruction. None of her bras fit anymore and she has complained of feeling overweight and constantly nauseous. So to make her feel better, I volunteered to help her buy some new bras at M&S this weekend.
Who ever thought that lingerie sections of stores were a turn-on were obviously very sex starved or blind. They are dull, dull, dull. Somehow, they manage to sanitise and de-sex the whole lingerie thing into a bland consumable much like the rest of the M&S clothing collection. The sheer choice of bras on offer make it feel like you are in a low-cost supermarket. While Cat was busy trying on her numerous bra choices, I soon lost patience and retired downstairs to the Men’s section. I wish I hadn’t bothered, more V-neck pullovers and acrylic trousers than any sane person could bare. The sad thing is, I realise that soon (but I hope not too soon), I will be shopping for these very same blandables as middle age beckons and all sense of style and fashion is lost forever.

Water wings

Cat and I went swimming last night, in what must be the first time I have touched a chlorine pool in years. Many years.
York Hall in Bethnal Green is this very old building dedicated to boxing shows and Xmas panto, but adjacent to it is a pool and fitness room. Considering it is run by Tower Hamlets and is very old, the whole facility is not too bad. I have seen worse, but for £2.75 a swim, who’s complaining?My first few lengths were appalling, flapping and gasping for air, I genuinely thought I could knock off a few hundred metres in Olympic fashion when actually, I could barely make one length. It got better but my stamina was very bad. Cat on the other hand had one purpose in mind. To hold on the side and just paddle her legs, building up those all important hip, thigh and waist muscle groups. With her swim suit, tied back hair and ever present smile, she could pass off as a synchronised swimmer! Give it a few months and she’ll look like a very pregnant synchronised swimmer.

Ginger snaps

Cat reported the first symptoms of morning sickness. Actually it happened during the day, just after lunch and hasn’t abated since. The only respite is with a nibble of ginger biscuits, but it soon comes back. Constant nausea and occasional vomiting. Well, we were getting cocky thinking it wouldn’t happen, but it seems Cat is not immune to it. Morning sickness is described very much as like having travel sickness. In my case, I get extremely disorientated and nauseous playing first person computer games – so that’s the nearest I can empathise with. At least I can stop playing games, but Cat has to weather the storm all alone. Last night, we bought five packs of Ginger snaps and sweets. Funny cos Cat always liked ginger, but I can’t really stand the stuff.

Meet the (soon-to-be Grand) parents

Well this weekend was ‘tell the parents’ weekend. Or should I say
prospective grandparents. First off was the in-laws – Cat’s Mum and Dad. We went to visit them and broke the news simply with a ‘Cat’s pregnant’ mention over breakfast. Their response was about as animated and elated as I had ever seen them - ie not very. This is not to say they weren’t delighted, because they absolutely were. It is just that Cat’s Mum and dad have typical British reserved
response to things and simply do not leap up and down at any news. What we
got was a very reserved reply of ‘that’s nice dear!’ before moving on
to practical conversations about building drawbridge ramps across our awkward
staircase (belive me, you don’t want to know!)
Returning to London, we popped in to my parents and Cat devised a unique
way of informing them. My Dad has been spending the past few weeks translating and typing up our lengthy family tree. Cat was helping him type it out and casually dropped in the estimated birthdate and potential name of a
mystery 21st generation Yang. My dad looked puzzled at first by the print out and
then it clicked and he leapt up and down in excitement. My Mum was equally
delighted, though refrained from the leaping. Beaming smiles all round
though we did warn that at 6 weeks, we were letting them know early due tomy Dad being out of the country for several months.

All pain and all gain

Cat seems to think there is a pressing need to get fit. She’s certainly not maintained a fitness regime for quite some time and is worried that she won’t have the stamina for pregnancy. With the added worry of her loose hips (pubis synthesis) we have both embarked on a ‘get fit quick but without damaging the hips’ regime.
Every morning, we now walk to the tube. It takes about twenty minutes and we’ve had to take a longer route since the smell of morning traffic on the main roads is really repulsive. We are also going swimming. Not a favourite past-time for either of us, but it is good exercise for her joints and muscles without the load bearing. I don’t think she is taking her Pelvic floor exercises to seriously though and keep warning her she will have moments of incontinence if she doesn’t strengthen her muscles.This weekend, we will announce the news to close family. It seems the right thing to do. In any case, Cat is getting very bored with not telling anyone and feels the need to release. We’ll see how the others take the news.

Winds of change

I’ve been suffering from very bad sleep these past few days. Partly down to Cat’s restless sleep patterns (though she maintains she sleeps fine) and partly down to my bundle of worries. Over the weekend, we went to Borders and bought a small mobile library’s worth of pregnancy books. On the one hand these books provide us with knowledge and of course knowledge is good right? Well I guess so, but it also increases your anxiety as you learn more about the pitfalls and hurdles along the way.
Every minute I keep checking up on Cat, much to her annoyance, to see if she has any of the visible signs of early pregnancy, or if she feels a bit sicky, mood swings, or bloated etc. So far, the only symptom of her pregnancy is copious amounts of wind. Typical.
Dinner with my parents last night was agonising cos they were talking about making plans for the future and the prospect of kids and we were dying to tell them. But we agreed to wait…until next week! Some believe it is bad luck or too early to announce the news, but our family have always been very close and we reasoned it was better to tell them fairly early to ensure we get the best support. Plus, since my Dad is going away for many months, it was better he hear the news at home, rather than over a crackly phone.This morning, Cat stated that she no longer had a fear of giving birth – something she was very vocal about before. In fact, she felt very safe about the idea.

Marmite and Toast

We both find ourselves constantly occupied with thoughts about the big news. Our minds are brimming half with excitement, half with anxiety. To be honest, it still hasn’t sunk in. To help, I thought I should actually gen up asap on information, so off I trawled to the internet.

Well, apparently, Cat needed to have taken Folic Acid at least a month before conception. Something about preventing neural tubes abnormalities. Damn I thought, we’ve missed out on a crucial stage so I sent her out to immediately buy some tablets. Then I read that Marmite is fortified with extra Folic Acid. Now I felt guilty – all those months she happily snacked away with copious amounts of the black stuff on her toast while I spitted disgust at the foul tasting spread. With any luck, the Marmite will count towards her pre-conception dosage of folic acid.

The BBC website has a handy pregnancy calculator. Here was something else we did not know – pregnancy duration is calculated from the date of her last period, not from the moment of conception. That means that Cat is already five weeks pregnant. And the egg is already a dividing little ball of cells implanted into the womb. Fascinating. Like a real live biology class that will, cross fingers, last 9 months. The predictor suggests 8th November. Very close to my Mum’s own birthday. Now what are the chances of a birth falling on the same day as one of our parents? It’s happened before – Malcolm was born on the same day as his father’s father.

We are both very aware that it is still incredibly early days so the urge to tell all and sundry must be suppressed. But there is careful optimism already. Cat even suggested we take regular photos to chart her body as it changes. I went one further by suggesting a video diary. We’ll see how much cooperation I get when the mood swings set in a few weeks down the line!
Over the next few weeks. That small bundle of cells growing inside Cat will develop at a furious pace. We hope and pray that everything goes according to plan.

First entry - the big news

Just eight little letters signalled the beginning of the rest of my life. Those letters, spelled out as tiny black LCD dots, read one thing, one word I was really not expecting, but secretly hoping…pregnant.

For days now, Cat had been wondering if our one moment of unprotected husband-wife hanky panky would be enough to make her pregnant since it occurred on the same day as her Persona said she was ovulating.

That would be too ridiculously easy I confidently claimed. There was no way, that in just one half hearted naive attempt at conception, she would get pregnant. I mean, surely we were destined for months and months of ‘trying’like almost every other couple I had talked to.

Well, the first pregnancy test was one of those watch the lines type and you need to see two lines to confirm the pregnancy. The second line was very feint so I assumed it was a negative. Cat was less sure, so she bought a different brand – this time a digital one – and sure enough, there it was spelled out in black and white.

So here we are, a couple of hours into our first pregnancy and I am still too much in shock to take in the magnitude of the situation. A million thoughts race through my head, much the same as a billion fathers to be before me have thought. Like, My God, what a baby, now? I’m not ready. Will it be healthy. What if it’s a boy..or a girl? How will we cope financially. I’m dying to tell everyone, but caution, caution there is a long way to go and it seems, we are only on the very first rung of a very big ladder. Excitement and barely contained happiness mixed with anciety are what fills me at this moment in time.